I am back. But this time I'm REALLY back. There's probably not anyone here anymore, and I'm sure that I'm talking to myself here, but hey...I'm good company!
Let me get you up to speed. As is my way, I'll give the bad news first.
The bad news is, I think that I've gained most of my weight back. There. It's out there! And in truth, I can't tell you when it started. What I can tell you is that, for me, gaining weight is tied to me not weighing in, not counting calories, and not doing purposeful exercise. Surprise, right? No. Of course not. Despite what some say, the key to weight loss is no special formula, no secret cleanse, no fad diet. It's calories in < calories out. That's really it. Seems so easy, doesn't it? And it is. We are the only monkey wrenches that are thrown into that simple equation. And I am my own WORST monkey wrench.
The neutral news is that I haven't weighed myself in ages. I've gone to the doctor for my regular exams over the past year, but I've turned my head when the nurse weighed me. So I have no idea where I am, but I know that my clothes don't feel good. And I know that I feel the extra weight. I can just tell that I take up more space than before. Depressing? No. A bummer? Of course!
Now, to end with the good news. :) I am still physically active. I am lazier, and I have less motivation to do things, but I do them anyway and I am capable of them. Hubs and I have been skiing quite a bit this winter and have another trip planned next month. We hiked through hiking season and summitted some very tough mountains. Then again, there were some that we didn't summit. We blamed it on not starting early enough, and therefore subsequently would be returning in the dark, which we didn't want to do, so we'd turn around. But the truth is that we started plenty early. I just required too many breaks and was hiking too slowly. That makes me sad, but I know that I am not powerless over it. Because what I also know is that it will just take a little more purposeful exercise to help me, and I can certainly manage that!
So here I am. I am a statistic, I suppose. And I'm a bit ashamed, to be honest, but I know that I'm not the only one fighting the battle. I don't look down on anyone who is struggling with their weight, and so I shouldn't look down on myself. Right?
Right. :)
Stay tuned for Weigh-In Wednesday, please. And if you're here, let me know. :) And be my cheerleader, because even if I don't want to admit it...it helps.
Sunday, January 19, 2014
Monday, June 18, 2012
Juice-tastic!
Oh...hi! :)
Gosh, it's only been about hundred years. I'm not actually sure when I last blogged, and now Blogger has this whole new layout that I don't know my way around yet, so...just hi.
I'm way too tired right now to properly blog, and that is because I am on day one of the Reboot Your Life program, lovingly detailed in the movie Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead. I figure if a 430-pound trucker can juice for 60 days, I can juice for a mere 30.
So, obviously, day one just sucks ass. There's not even a nicer way to put it. I'm tired, cranky, tired, and did I mention tired? Sugar detoxing is the pits, I tell you. The pits.
What I am not is hungry. That surprises me in a way that I cannot even fully verbalize. I find that it takes me about an hour to finish a massive cup of juice, partially because it's so massive and partially because it's so effing DISGUSTING. I need to work on my recipes, clearly. But yes, praise whomever that I'm not hungry.
This is a lame post, but I'm tired. Have an awesome picture for the road. :)
This is just a sliver of the view into Tuckerman Ravine, a few hundred yards from the summit of Mount Washington. My body, though perhaps carrying a little extra weight here and there, allows me to hike and mountain climb to some of the most beautiful places I've ever seen. I am grateful. :)
Gosh, it's only been about hundred years. I'm not actually sure when I last blogged, and now Blogger has this whole new layout that I don't know my way around yet, so...just hi.
I'm way too tired right now to properly blog, and that is because I am on day one of the Reboot Your Life program, lovingly detailed in the movie Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead. I figure if a 430-pound trucker can juice for 60 days, I can juice for a mere 30.
So, obviously, day one just sucks ass. There's not even a nicer way to put it. I'm tired, cranky, tired, and did I mention tired? Sugar detoxing is the pits, I tell you. The pits.
What I am not is hungry. That surprises me in a way that I cannot even fully verbalize. I find that it takes me about an hour to finish a massive cup of juice, partially because it's so massive and partially because it's so effing DISGUSTING. I need to work on my recipes, clearly. But yes, praise whomever that I'm not hungry.
This is a lame post, but I'm tired. Have an awesome picture for the road. :)
This is just a sliver of the view into Tuckerman Ravine, a few hundred yards from the summit of Mount Washington. My body, though perhaps carrying a little extra weight here and there, allows me to hike and mountain climb to some of the most beautiful places I've ever seen. I am grateful. :)
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Time to Face the Fat!: Part I
Well, wait...
You don't think I'll write a Part II if there's nobody reading, do you?
Can you raise your hand if you're still around, please? I'll make it worth your while if you are! ;)
You don't think I'll write a Part II if there's nobody reading, do you?
Can you raise your hand if you're still around, please? I'll make it worth your while if you are! ;)
Monday, February 14, 2011
In the Zone
Happy Valentine's Day, folks! I'm proud to say Hubs and I swapped health-oriented gifts this year - the Gregory Baltoro 70 mountaineering pack for him and the Gregory Deva 70 for me! These packs won Backpacker magazine's Editors' Choice award for best mountaineering pack in 2008. It couldn't have happened at a better time, because Hubs and I just decided last night that we're going away again the first week of March to do some hiking/snowshoeing! I'm so excited to hike with this pack. (It's the little things, people.)
(Note: I just ate an entire Ghirardelli peppermint bark bar that I got from one of my patients. I'm going to pretend that didn't happen. [By the way, they're creamy and delicious.])
Okay, on to dieting wisdome now. (Ha!) Over the weekend I started reading Feeding the Hungry Heart by Geneen Roth. The book was written in 1982, but I really do believe that it's still relevant today. Basically, she talks about a concept that is more familiar to people today than it was 30 (!!!) years ago, and that is the concept of emotional eating - eating for comfort, to relieve stress, to fill a void. I'm only about 20 pages in, and although I've known for some time now that I'm an emotional eater, the book is still giving me some things to think about. Let me give you one example of what I've realized.
Obviously, eating mindfully is important. If we can slow ourselves down when we're eating and really experience our food - the taste, the smell, the texture - then we would enjoy it more and subsequently need less to satisfy us. Right? Right. I know this is true, of course it is. We know our tastebuds get "numb" after so many bites of something, and at that point we're just eating to eat. Which brings me to the next point, and that's the importance of eating until you're not quite full but just about - perhaps a 6 on a scale from 1-10, keeping in mind that in about 20 minutes our brain will have gotten the signal that our bellies are full, which will take us to a 7 or 8.
I can't tell you how many times I've eaten to a 10, and half an hour later feeling so full that I was nauseous. Yet something inside of me drives me to eat until I'm uncomfortable, something in my head whispers to me and tells me that if I'm a 10 then I know I'm full. And what does "full" mean here? It means so much more than simply not hungry. It means that my nameless void is filled, at least for the moment. And that means that I don't have to think about anything else except my uncomfortably gorged state - no time for anxiety, for doubt, for self-reflection and perhaps not liking what I see. Just food, fat, and the hope that I can shit in the near future for a little relief.
So what do I mean by "in the zone"? Well, it goes back to mindful eating. I have tried mindful eating before and it's very upsetting. Want to know why? Because if I'm mindful about what I'm eating, I'll stop sooner rather than later. Try to wrap your head around why THAT'S upsetting. Nevermind, I'll just tell you: It's because if I stop eating, then what? What fills my void? What alleviates my anxiety? How do I accept the less-than-wonderful things I see in my self-reflection - the fact that I'm not exercising as much as I should be, that I don't clean/organize as much as I should, that I don't try new places or things? I don't want to have to sit with my anxiety, I don't want to see the negative parts of me, so I can't be mindful when I eat. Nope, I just shut off that "mindfulness switch" and pathetically and methodically move from bag to mouth (chips are my go-to food), back and forth, back and forth. Knowing that I'll eventually reach 10. Knowing that I can't stop now because the saltier my mouth gets the less I have to focus on life. Knowing that I should be getting on the treadmill but eating is so much easier and delicious.
So now let's come back to the present. It's Monday morning, and you all know how I feel about Mondays. I woke up this morning feeling not quite empowered, but at least a little hopeful. Over the weekend I made seven-layer bars for Hubs, which are delicious, and I decided to have one for breakfast because I knew I would eat one eventually today, so why not make it legitimate. When I punched the recipe into my LoseIt! app on my iTouch, I learned that one bar has 585 calories in it. Nope, that wasn't a typo. So then I said to myself, "Well, it's Valentine's Day." (There's almost always an excuse.) Then I got to work and ate that candy bar I mentioned up there, "because I already screwed up for the day," or at least that's what I told myself. But what is the truth? The truth is that I have a lot I want to get done and I'm not making the time to do it, I haven't exercised in ages, and I had a rather unsuccessful food weekend. All of that anxiety and mild self-loathing makes that void absolutely yawn, and so I yearn to fill it. And then the cycle begins again.
-------------------------
Wow, how cathartic. Nice to have that all out of my head and written down. Perhaps that means I can start to attack it? We'll see. In better news, I'm on track as far as my weight loss goes - I lost 1.5 pounds last week! No small feat given all of these damn mental barriers.
Happy Valentine's Day!
(Note: I just ate an entire Ghirardelli peppermint bark bar that I got from one of my patients. I'm going to pretend that didn't happen. [By the way, they're creamy and delicious.])
Okay, on to dieting wisdome now. (Ha!) Over the weekend I started reading Feeding the Hungry Heart by Geneen Roth. The book was written in 1982, but I really do believe that it's still relevant today. Basically, she talks about a concept that is more familiar to people today than it was 30 (!!!) years ago, and that is the concept of emotional eating - eating for comfort, to relieve stress, to fill a void. I'm only about 20 pages in, and although I've known for some time now that I'm an emotional eater, the book is still giving me some things to think about. Let me give you one example of what I've realized.
Obviously, eating mindfully is important. If we can slow ourselves down when we're eating and really experience our food - the taste, the smell, the texture - then we would enjoy it more and subsequently need less to satisfy us. Right? Right. I know this is true, of course it is. We know our tastebuds get "numb" after so many bites of something, and at that point we're just eating to eat. Which brings me to the next point, and that's the importance of eating until you're not quite full but just about - perhaps a 6 on a scale from 1-10, keeping in mind that in about 20 minutes our brain will have gotten the signal that our bellies are full, which will take us to a 7 or 8.
I can't tell you how many times I've eaten to a 10, and half an hour later feeling so full that I was nauseous. Yet something inside of me drives me to eat until I'm uncomfortable, something in my head whispers to me and tells me that if I'm a 10 then I know I'm full. And what does "full" mean here? It means so much more than simply not hungry. It means that my nameless void is filled, at least for the moment. And that means that I don't have to think about anything else except my uncomfortably gorged state - no time for anxiety, for doubt, for self-reflection and perhaps not liking what I see. Just food, fat, and the hope that I can shit in the near future for a little relief.
So what do I mean by "in the zone"? Well, it goes back to mindful eating. I have tried mindful eating before and it's very upsetting. Want to know why? Because if I'm mindful about what I'm eating, I'll stop sooner rather than later. Try to wrap your head around why THAT'S upsetting. Nevermind, I'll just tell you: It's because if I stop eating, then what? What fills my void? What alleviates my anxiety? How do I accept the less-than-wonderful things I see in my self-reflection - the fact that I'm not exercising as much as I should be, that I don't clean/organize as much as I should, that I don't try new places or things? I don't want to have to sit with my anxiety, I don't want to see the negative parts of me, so I can't be mindful when I eat. Nope, I just shut off that "mindfulness switch" and pathetically and methodically move from bag to mouth (chips are my go-to food), back and forth, back and forth. Knowing that I'll eventually reach 10. Knowing that I can't stop now because the saltier my mouth gets the less I have to focus on life. Knowing that I should be getting on the treadmill but eating is so much easier and delicious.
So now let's come back to the present. It's Monday morning, and you all know how I feel about Mondays. I woke up this morning feeling not quite empowered, but at least a little hopeful. Over the weekend I made seven-layer bars for Hubs, which are delicious, and I decided to have one for breakfast because I knew I would eat one eventually today, so why not make it legitimate. When I punched the recipe into my LoseIt! app on my iTouch, I learned that one bar has 585 calories in it. Nope, that wasn't a typo. So then I said to myself, "Well, it's Valentine's Day." (There's almost always an excuse.) Then I got to work and ate that candy bar I mentioned up there, "because I already screwed up for the day," or at least that's what I told myself. But what is the truth? The truth is that I have a lot I want to get done and I'm not making the time to do it, I haven't exercised in ages, and I had a rather unsuccessful food weekend. All of that anxiety and mild self-loathing makes that void absolutely yawn, and so I yearn to fill it. And then the cycle begins again.
-------------------------
Wow, how cathartic. Nice to have that all out of my head and written down. Perhaps that means I can start to attack it? We'll see. In better news, I'm on track as far as my weight loss goes - I lost 1.5 pounds last week! No small feat given all of these damn mental barriers.
Happy Valentine's Day!
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
So Many Mondays!
"I'll start again on Monday." The story of my life!
Mondays, firsts of the month...all good times to recommit to your healthy lifestyle, right? That's what I tell myself every Friday and Saturday night, or on like the 25th, 26th, 27th (etc.) of the month when I feel pleasantly gorged from a calorie-laden, satisfyingly fatty, all-around-happy-making meal. So imagine the meal I eat when it's the weekend AND the end of the month!
Well, I won't go into details, but I can say it wasn't pretty. I didn't binge eat or anything like that, but my weekend did involve the following elements: 1) Cheesecake Factory, complete with cheesecake (because how could you not?), 2) my brother-in-law's birthday, complete with birthday cake, way too much wine, and lots of cheese and crackers, and 3) homemade chocolate chip cookies. I made over 50 on Friday and I think there are 7 left today. I wonder how that happens. (Hint: It's not Hubs' fault.)
The good news? Well, I'm maintaining my weight. I haven't gained, which of course is a miracle. Too bad I'm not looking to hold steady, eh? So okay, I have a bad weekend behind me...and today is February 1st! Oh, thank you Jesus for the first of the month again. You bestow those on me 12 times a year and I am just TICKLED.
I am feeling a little more serious this month, for two reasons. The first is that I am meeting up with a few of my girlfriends in April for a weekend of drunken, bisexual debauchery in New York City. I would like to lose a little more weight by then (even though I look super-fabulous already). The bigger reason though is that we have our family's annual beach vacation in July, and quite frankly I'm tired of not being at my goal weight every time we f*cking go.
So here's the deal. I have 23 weeks (and a few days) before that vacation. If I commit to losing 1.5 pounds a week I can be down about 35 pounds, which really isn't that lofty of a goal. I'd rather be down 45 (keeping my fingers crossed for 2 pounds a week!) but 35 if better than nothing. Of course that means I'll only be down 12 pounds by my Girls' Weekend, but again, it's better than nothing.
Since today's Tuesday, that will be my official weigh-in day. I'll have to wait until next week though, because I just had cereal and coffee for breakfast. ;)
Oh...and please don't look back in my blog at how many times I've "recommitted", okay? Have some mercy. ;) And hey, I still lost over 60 pounds and have kept it off for 2 years. That's a victory, right???
Happy Tuesday! (I'm taking a non-sick sick day today. Wheeee!)
-----------------------
Pssst, hey Lauren...thanks for kicking me in the pants to get another entry up! :)
Mondays, firsts of the month...all good times to recommit to your healthy lifestyle, right? That's what I tell myself every Friday and Saturday night, or on like the 25th, 26th, 27th (etc.) of the month when I feel pleasantly gorged from a calorie-laden, satisfyingly fatty, all-around-happy-making meal. So imagine the meal I eat when it's the weekend AND the end of the month!
Well, I won't go into details, but I can say it wasn't pretty. I didn't binge eat or anything like that, but my weekend did involve the following elements: 1) Cheesecake Factory, complete with cheesecake (because how could you not?), 2) my brother-in-law's birthday, complete with birthday cake, way too much wine, and lots of cheese and crackers, and 3) homemade chocolate chip cookies. I made over 50 on Friday and I think there are 7 left today. I wonder how that happens. (Hint: It's not Hubs' fault.)
The good news? Well, I'm maintaining my weight. I haven't gained, which of course is a miracle. Too bad I'm not looking to hold steady, eh? So okay, I have a bad weekend behind me...and today is February 1st! Oh, thank you Jesus for the first of the month again. You bestow those on me 12 times a year and I am just TICKLED.
I am feeling a little more serious this month, for two reasons. The first is that I am meeting up with a few of my girlfriends in April for a weekend of drunken, bisexual debauchery in New York City. I would like to lose a little more weight by then (even though I look super-fabulous already). The bigger reason though is that we have our family's annual beach vacation in July, and quite frankly I'm tired of not being at my goal weight every time we f*cking go.
So here's the deal. I have 23 weeks (and a few days) before that vacation. If I commit to losing 1.5 pounds a week I can be down about 35 pounds, which really isn't that lofty of a goal. I'd rather be down 45 (keeping my fingers crossed for 2 pounds a week!) but 35 if better than nothing. Of course that means I'll only be down 12 pounds by my Girls' Weekend, but again, it's better than nothing.
Since today's Tuesday, that will be my official weigh-in day. I'll have to wait until next week though, because I just had cereal and coffee for breakfast. ;)
Oh...and please don't look back in my blog at how many times I've "recommitted", okay? Have some mercy. ;) And hey, I still lost over 60 pounds and have kept it off for 2 years. That's a victory, right???
Happy Tuesday! (I'm taking a non-sick sick day today. Wheeee!)
-----------------------
Pssst, hey Lauren...thanks for kicking me in the pants to get another entry up! :)
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Hungry and Disorderly
Oh my, folks. Let me tell you about this weekend. Well, to preface, let me tell you that I bake like Betty Crocker. I'm seriously an amazing baker, and when I bake something, I can't help but to partake. And so on Friday night, as a gift to my husband for being an amazing man, I baked chocolate chip cookies. 52 of them.
I think that 35 of them may have found their way to my stomach over the course of my three-day weekend. I'm not exaggerating or trying to be funny...I actually think that happened. I say that because there were only about 15 cookies left as of this morning, and I just didn't see Hubs eating as many as I did. Well, that and the fact that Hubs just doesn't binge-eat like I do. Oh, and on Sunday morning Hubs brought me a donut back from the coffee shop, and I scarfed that as well. If it weren't for the cookies and the donut it would have been a successful weekend.
Hmmm...okay, that's kind of a lie. Because Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday night, about an hour before we fell asleep, I binged like a starving animal. Well, maybe it doesn't quite classify as bingeing, but I ate a LOT. Potato chips, pretty much as many as I could shove in my mouth over a 15 minute period; mixed nuts, which were so delicious and salty and salty and delicious; did I mention chocolate chip cookies? Oh, and caramel corn, tons of it. And last night - the piece de resistance - there was pretty much nothing left in our pantry so I found a box of crackers we got in a gift basket for Christmas and pretty much ate three-quarters of those.
Wow, this was like confession.
----------------------------------------
Today has been more successful on paper, but not mentally. I had a good fiber-filled breakfast, a great fruit- and veggie-filled lunch, and I have an apple and a cheese stick for my commute snack. But mentally and physically...and I really think it's both, though more mental when it comes to what I choose to eat...I'm ravenous. I want to eat and eat and eat until the horrible food demon inside of me shuts the hell up, I want him to feel satisfied for once, and I want him to leave me alone. He's like the monkey on my back that I keep feeding so he'll quiet down, only perpetuating the cycle. Fucking monkey can kiss my ass.
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And that was cathartic.
Happy Tuesday, folks. Send good vibes out into the universe for me to have a better week, would ya? ;)
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Oh, and how could I forget? I lost two more pounds last week, bringing me down 5 pounds in two weeks. Not bad, except that I probably undid most of that over the last four days. Boo!!!
I think that 35 of them may have found their way to my stomach over the course of my three-day weekend. I'm not exaggerating or trying to be funny...I actually think that happened. I say that because there were only about 15 cookies left as of this morning, and I just didn't see Hubs eating as many as I did. Well, that and the fact that Hubs just doesn't binge-eat like I do. Oh, and on Sunday morning Hubs brought me a donut back from the coffee shop, and I scarfed that as well. If it weren't for the cookies and the donut it would have been a successful weekend.
Hmmm...okay, that's kind of a lie. Because Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday night, about an hour before we fell asleep, I binged like a starving animal. Well, maybe it doesn't quite classify as bingeing, but I ate a LOT. Potato chips, pretty much as many as I could shove in my mouth over a 15 minute period; mixed nuts, which were so delicious and salty and salty and delicious; did I mention chocolate chip cookies? Oh, and caramel corn, tons of it. And last night - the piece de resistance - there was pretty much nothing left in our pantry so I found a box of crackers we got in a gift basket for Christmas and pretty much ate three-quarters of those.
Wow, this was like confession.
----------------------------------------
Today has been more successful on paper, but not mentally. I had a good fiber-filled breakfast, a great fruit- and veggie-filled lunch, and I have an apple and a cheese stick for my commute snack. But mentally and physically...and I really think it's both, though more mental when it comes to what I choose to eat...I'm ravenous. I want to eat and eat and eat until the horrible food demon inside of me shuts the hell up, I want him to feel satisfied for once, and I want him to leave me alone. He's like the monkey on my back that I keep feeding so he'll quiet down, only perpetuating the cycle. Fucking monkey can kiss my ass.
----------------------------------------
And that was cathartic.
Happy Tuesday, folks. Send good vibes out into the universe for me to have a better week, would ya? ;)
--------------
Oh, and how could I forget? I lost two more pounds last week, bringing me down 5 pounds in two weeks. Not bad, except that I probably undid most of that over the last four days. Boo!!!
Friday, January 7, 2011
Blindness? Death?
Happy Friday, folks! This is just a very quick check-in to say that I weighed in today and lost 3 pounds. This takes me down to a whopping....oh, damn it. I just still can't write that number! Instead, I'll leave you with a few pictures from vacation last week. We were snowshoeing up to a point called Artist's Bluff in Franconia Notch in the White Mountains of New Hampshire. This hike is just enough to get the heart pumping in the spring, summer, and fall...but in the winter on a pair of snowshoes it's WORK! And it was a great time. :)
That's pretty much a 45 degree angle. (I was a physics minor...I'm not exaggerating!)
See that rock up there? That's the high point, and that's where we eventually ended up.
Hubs took this picture. Snowshoeing this really was a fun time.
And the view is ALWAYS worth it. :)
In other news, my eye is STILL blurry. I went to the ophthalmologist for a follow-up yesterday and he said, "Yeah, that's definitely not a corneal abrasion. I don't know what it is, but it's definitely not that. You'll see our corneal specialist next week."
Boy, when someone is talking about your eye, you really don't want to hear them say "I don't know what it is". LOL Ah well...nothing to do but wait until Wednesday to see the specialist and hope I don't go blind or die before then.
Enjoy the weekend!!! :)
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Return of the Purple Monster
Happy Wednesday, folks! First and foremost, thanks to the few and the proud who welcomed me back. :) It was so nice to see that you guys were still here! Barbara, you were right about that blogging every day thing...that's way too ambitious for me! It's evidenced by the fact that I said I'd be blogging daily starting Monday, and now it's Wednesday. You've probably noticed that I didn't post my weight, but that's because I'm not weighing in until Friday. I figure that instead of traumatizing myself, I'll get on the scale after 5 days of peeing and pooing and getting on the wagon a bit. It's just better for my mental health that way.
Things have been going quite well since Monday. Lots of good food, 5-9 fruits and veggies, and I'm finally pooing normally again. Sorry if that's too much, but I gotta tell you...a great way for me to tell if my diet sucks is whether I'm pooing or not. When I don't get enough fruits or veggies, everything likes to stay in my cozy digestive tract, which makes me uncomfortable and angry. So yay for a normal poo schedule! My only challenge lately - well, since the summer, really - has been getting in 64 ounces of water a day. I was always so good with that, but since July I've been doing all outpatient work, and I just don't have the kind of time I had before to use the bathroom. Isn't that pathetic? But seriously, if I peed as much as I do when I drink all that water, I'd never get out of work on time. So I've been getting in about 52 or so...not terrible, but I could do better. I've also upped my coffee intake from 20 ounces to 40 ounces, but they say an extra cup or two is good for you. ;) I certainly feel more alert!
Some of you might remember when I tried my hand at blending fruits and veggies into a smoothie and came up with the Purple Monster. Well, it's back and better than ever! I took a few pictures of it because I was proud of how healthy it looked. The pictures suck, but luckily this isn't a photography blog.
Here it is chilling out in the blender:
Oh my gosh, it was so good. I really enjoyed it!
Interesting tidbit: Hubs and I were in the White Mountains last week doing some snowshoeing. On Thursday I bent down to tighten my strap while we were hiking and a stick poked me right in the eye. I said, "If I didn't have more respect for nature I'd break that f*cking thing in half." Well, Mother Nature heard me. I started having photosensitivity and tearing of my eye on Saturday, and when I finally went to the ophthalmologist on Monday (because it was still horrible) I found out I have a nasty corneal abrasion. So now I'm on antibiotics for it. So anyway, my vision was a little blurry and I was cutting something on Monday night with our Ginsu knife...and I went nearly through the tip of my finger. It was absolutely ridiculous. So I have a corneal abrasion, I'm on Augmentin for a sinus infection (that's already cleared), and I have a Band-Aid on my left index finger covering a gross wound. Which leads me to...
Fun fact o' the day: Yesterday at work I smelled marijuana all morning. I thought all of my patients were smoking pot. You know what it was though? It was the smell of my Band-Aid. Yep, my Band-Aid (a clean one, mind you, not a grody old dirty one) smelled like marijuana. Who knew?
Goodnight! :)
Things have been going quite well since Monday. Lots of good food, 5-9 fruits and veggies, and I'm finally pooing normally again. Sorry if that's too much, but I gotta tell you...a great way for me to tell if my diet sucks is whether I'm pooing or not. When I don't get enough fruits or veggies, everything likes to stay in my cozy digestive tract, which makes me uncomfortable and angry. So yay for a normal poo schedule! My only challenge lately - well, since the summer, really - has been getting in 64 ounces of water a day. I was always so good with that, but since July I've been doing all outpatient work, and I just don't have the kind of time I had before to use the bathroom. Isn't that pathetic? But seriously, if I peed as much as I do when I drink all that water, I'd never get out of work on time. So I've been getting in about 52 or so...not terrible, but I could do better. I've also upped my coffee intake from 20 ounces to 40 ounces, but they say an extra cup or two is good for you. ;) I certainly feel more alert!
Some of you might remember when I tried my hand at blending fruits and veggies into a smoothie and came up with the Purple Monster. Well, it's back and better than ever! I took a few pictures of it because I was proud of how healthy it looked. The pictures suck, but luckily this isn't a photography blog.
Here it is chilling out in the blender:
For two Purple Monsters (Hubs wanted one!) - 2 cups of unsweetened vanilla almond milk, 2 big handfuls of spinach, 2 bananas, and 2 cups of frozen blueberries. It was seriously awesome!
Here it is all blended up and looking lovely:
Oh my gosh, it was so good. I really enjoyed it!
Interesting tidbit: Hubs and I were in the White Mountains last week doing some snowshoeing. On Thursday I bent down to tighten my strap while we were hiking and a stick poked me right in the eye. I said, "If I didn't have more respect for nature I'd break that f*cking thing in half." Well, Mother Nature heard me. I started having photosensitivity and tearing of my eye on Saturday, and when I finally went to the ophthalmologist on Monday (because it was still horrible) I found out I have a nasty corneal abrasion. So now I'm on antibiotics for it. So anyway, my vision was a little blurry and I was cutting something on Monday night with our Ginsu knife...and I went nearly through the tip of my finger. It was absolutely ridiculous. So I have a corneal abrasion, I'm on Augmentin for a sinus infection (that's already cleared), and I have a Band-Aid on my left index finger covering a gross wound. Which leads me to...
Fun fact o' the day: Yesterday at work I smelled marijuana all morning. I thought all of my patients were smoking pot. You know what it was though? It was the smell of my Band-Aid. Yep, my Band-Aid (a clean one, mind you, not a grody old dirty one) smelled like marijuana. Who knew?
Goodnight! :)
Saturday, January 1, 2011
Knock, knock: Who's there?
Oh, it's just me. ;)
I've been a bad blogger. I've also been a bad dieter! One of my New Year's resolutions? Just like millions of other people, I will be eating healthier and finally reaching my goal weight in 2011! And maybe NOT like millions of other people, I will be blogging every day, so please stay tuned. I know I don't have tons of readers, but for the few that stayed with me, I hope you're still here...and I hope you'll stick with me for 2011. :)
Oh, ummm...this will be starting January 3rd. LOL! See you Monday!
I've been a bad blogger. I've also been a bad dieter! One of my New Year's resolutions? Just like millions of other people, I will be eating healthier and finally reaching my goal weight in 2011! And maybe NOT like millions of other people, I will be blogging every day, so please stay tuned. I know I don't have tons of readers, but for the few that stayed with me, I hope you're still here...and I hope you'll stick with me for 2011. :)
Oh, ummm...this will be starting January 3rd. LOL! See you Monday!
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Uggly
I can't help myself.
I am loving Uggs!!! After much complaining yet admiring, and a lot of back-and-forth in my mind, Hubs took me out last night to feed me delicious food and to shop for Uggs. Here's the thing: I get that they're ugly. I really do. But let me tell you something...I put my foot into a pair of black Classic Talls and I thought I saw Jesus. Oh my God, the warmth and the comfort... It was love.
And with that successful trial, my mind was made up. There was only one problem - Bloomingdale's didn't have my size, the bastards! But that's okay, ordering them online is where it's at. And in preparation for the boots, I ordered two fabulous pairs of skinny jeans from Gap today.
You read that right. The (formerly?) fat chick bought skinny jeans. No need to applaud.
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Hubs and I got back from a hiking trip to the White Mountains a few weeks ago. I meant to post pictures but of course I found better things to do. So here are some highlights:
Lonesome Lake, which is actually a mountain tarn. We'd already hiked to 2740' at this point.
Here I am doing a little scrambling:
Don't mind the look, I'm a bit tired. This is after our Lowe's Bald Spot hike...I'm eating a veggie sandwich with hummus on multi-grain bread. Delicious!
I am loving Uggs!!! After much complaining yet admiring, and a lot of back-and-forth in my mind, Hubs took me out last night to feed me delicious food and to shop for Uggs. Here's the thing: I get that they're ugly. I really do. But let me tell you something...I put my foot into a pair of black Classic Talls and I thought I saw Jesus. Oh my God, the warmth and the comfort... It was love.
And with that successful trial, my mind was made up. There was only one problem - Bloomingdale's didn't have my size, the bastards! But that's okay, ordering them online is where it's at. And in preparation for the boots, I ordered two fabulous pairs of skinny jeans from Gap today.
You read that right. The (formerly?) fat chick bought skinny jeans. No need to applaud.
---------------------------------------------------------
Hubs and I got back from a hiking trip to the White Mountains a few weeks ago. I meant to post pictures but of course I found better things to do. So here are some highlights:
Lonesome Lake, which is actually a mountain tarn. We'd already hiked to 2740' at this point.
The view from Lowe's Bald Spot. This was a LONG hike - 5.5 miles round trip, lots of elevation gained, lots of rock climbing involved. Exciting!
Square Ledge, one of our favorite hikes. Short but very steep - a lot of elevation gained over a short distance. Rock scrambling/climbing involved here. Love it!
Don't mind the look, I'm a bit tired. This is after our Lowe's Bald Spot hike...I'm eating a veggie sandwich with hummus on multi-grain bread. Delicious!
Lowe's Bald spot again. Yeah, we had to climb that rock. :)
So what's the point? The point is that I am so grateful to my body for allowing me to do things like this - for not failing me, for treating me so well even though I spent a lot of time treating her poorly. It's not quite an unconditional love - Lord knows we CAN do enough to ourselves to cause permanent damage - but it certainly is a forgiving one.
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Who's up for a challenge? My sister and I are! Our challenge is to lose 15 pounds by Christmas. Keep your fingers crossed for me!
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Huh?
All right, all right. So it's been a hundred years since I blogged. I just wasn't feeling it, quite honestly. I'd like to say that I was doing something fabulous like changing the world, but it really was just that I got into a really enjoyable book or three, had a few trips here and there which knocked things off schedule a bit, and at the end of the day, blogging just wasn't on the list. But better late than never, right?
So, diet-y stuff first. Depending on your perspective, things could be going well or not so well. I'm holding steady at 235-240, and I'm not really upset. I'm eating healthy meals for breakfast and lunch, getting in my 5-9 fruits and vegetables, and then coming home and eating for dinner whatever it is that speaks to me. Sometimes that means soup, cereal, healthy organic frozen dinners, or not-so-healthy takeout. But the truth is, I feel good and my clothes still fit and I look good, and so this makes it a little tougher for me to care about the number on the scale. Although sometimes I DO care, and then I get furious with myself...but that generally goes away. ;) Plus, I've been celebrating my birthday for the past week! My birthday is on October 9th but I celebrate for a whole week, because why not? So last weekend we visited my parents and brother and sister, and my grandparents joined us for cake. My grandmother is an honest woman - too honest for her own good sometimes, like the kind of woman who will give a compliment like this: "Oh, your hair looks nice...today." And she really doesn't do it to be rude, she just thinks she's doing you a disservice if she's not brutally honest. I can't tell you how many times she's gone up to people and said things like, "Oh, have you been eating more? Your clothes look tight." She has absolutely no qualms telling you what she thinks. So imagine my surprise when she said to me last weekend, "Wow, you look great. You're still losing weight, aren't you?" So I smiled and said, "Well, of course!" And I think I mentioned before, although the number on the scale is holding steady, I'm tightening my belt and my watch keeps getting bigger and bigger on my wrist. Who knows!
Check out this great birthday gift from my sister, and don't mind my badly-in-need-of-lotion hands:
On a fun note, I was invited to join a raw Ramen-eating contest here in the blog world. I was about to do it until I realized two things: 1) Ramen has MSG in it, which I really don't eat voluntarily anymore, and 2) We didn't have any left anyway! So that ship has sailed, unfortunately.
On an even more fun note, Hubs and I recently bought kayaks and we took them out for their maiden voyage yesterday for my birthday. It was the most beautiful day of the year, which must have been put together just for me. ;)
Happy Sunday!
So, diet-y stuff first. Depending on your perspective, things could be going well or not so well. I'm holding steady at 235-240, and I'm not really upset. I'm eating healthy meals for breakfast and lunch, getting in my 5-9 fruits and vegetables, and then coming home and eating for dinner whatever it is that speaks to me. Sometimes that means soup, cereal, healthy organic frozen dinners, or not-so-healthy takeout. But the truth is, I feel good and my clothes still fit and I look good, and so this makes it a little tougher for me to care about the number on the scale. Although sometimes I DO care, and then I get furious with myself...but that generally goes away. ;) Plus, I've been celebrating my birthday for the past week! My birthday is on October 9th but I celebrate for a whole week, because why not? So last weekend we visited my parents and brother and sister, and my grandparents joined us for cake. My grandmother is an honest woman - too honest for her own good sometimes, like the kind of woman who will give a compliment like this: "Oh, your hair looks nice...today." And she really doesn't do it to be rude, she just thinks she's doing you a disservice if she's not brutally honest. I can't tell you how many times she's gone up to people and said things like, "Oh, have you been eating more? Your clothes look tight." She has absolutely no qualms telling you what she thinks. So imagine my surprise when she said to me last weekend, "Wow, you look great. You're still losing weight, aren't you?" So I smiled and said, "Well, of course!" And I think I mentioned before, although the number on the scale is holding steady, I'm tightening my belt and my watch keeps getting bigger and bigger on my wrist. Who knows!
Check out this great birthday gift from my sister, and don't mind my badly-in-need-of-lotion hands:
And another fun gift from Hubs:
To answer the question I know you must be asking yourself, no, I'm not into owls. Or at least I never was before my birthday. I do find myself quite drawn to them now... As a matter of fact, after I got my owl ring last weekend from my sister, I heard my VERY FIRST OWL that night when Hubs and I were sitting on the porch. I'm like the Owl Whisperer. Hubs got the big owl for me while out running errands yesterday morning - I was getting a pedicure from my little Asian guy Charlie - and now I've decided that I'm going to put the owl in my office tomorrow. It's going to freak the hell out of my patients.
On an even more fun note, Hubs and I recently bought kayaks and we took them out for their maiden voyage yesterday for my birthday. It was the most beautiful day of the year, which must have been put together just for me. ;)
And now, on the most fun note ever, Hubs and I are headed up to the White Mountains next weekend for a week's worth of hiking and kayaking. It's badly needed...can't wait!
Happy Sunday!
Monday, September 13, 2010
A Giveaway...Just Not Here!
Hi folks!
Emily over at Eating Chalk has a super cool home improvement giveaway going on right now. Besides that, she has a really fun blog with lots of pictures and so many every day things that I think we all can relate to.
Good luck!
Emily over at Eating Chalk has a super cool home improvement giveaway going on right now. Besides that, she has a really fun blog with lots of pictures and so many every day things that I think we all can relate to.
Good luck!
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Objectified
So...I'm getting honked at again.
Allow me to explain.
I spent most of my adult life so far getting honked at, catcalled, and just generally being objectified. I'm not telling you that because I feel special, I'm telling you that because an interesting thing happened when I porked up a few years ago. Well, maybe not so interesting...expected, really. I stopped getting honked at as much. I wasn't really getting whistled at. And truth be told, it was a bit sad. Do I want to be objectified? Well, I'd like to always be able to say no and mean it, but I can't. What can I say? Approval is nice. Of course, Hubs has always approved of me, and he makes me feel sexier than any other man in the universe could, but it still makes me feel a little powerful when someone else finds me attractive. It's pathetic, I know. So yeah, if I'm being honest, I was a little disappointed when I wasn't getting as much attention. Isn't that so sick? It is...I realize that.
But hey, good news. Probably since I was at the 50-pounds-lost mark, I started getting attention again. Yesterday when I was on my way to the spa, I got honked at twice on the highway and once when I got out of my car in the spa parking lot. While I have no desire to turn on any men other than Hubs, it does make me feel pretty good about myself. I know, I know...feeling good should come from inside. But I firmly believe that anyone who says outside approval doesn't give them at least a little pleasure is lying through his/her teeth.
Well, this may be my most self-centered blog entry yet. I may lose a few readers, but at least I'm being honest!
I'll leave you with a few pictures from our recent mountain climbing trip. We hiked a 4,000-footer in the White Mountains, plus a few other mountains/trails. It was a good time, and just like once before, I was proud of my body for allowing me this pleasure. I've come a long way, number on the scale be damned!
(You'll notice I have no number for you. I'll be weighing in next week...got back from vacation on Tuesday and didn't particularly want to see the damage this week! LOL)
Allow me to explain.
I spent most of my adult life so far getting honked at, catcalled, and just generally being objectified. I'm not telling you that because I feel special, I'm telling you that because an interesting thing happened when I porked up a few years ago. Well, maybe not so interesting...expected, really. I stopped getting honked at as much. I wasn't really getting whistled at. And truth be told, it was a bit sad. Do I want to be objectified? Well, I'd like to always be able to say no and mean it, but I can't. What can I say? Approval is nice. Of course, Hubs has always approved of me, and he makes me feel sexier than any other man in the universe could, but it still makes me feel a little powerful when someone else finds me attractive. It's pathetic, I know. So yeah, if I'm being honest, I was a little disappointed when I wasn't getting as much attention. Isn't that so sick? It is...I realize that.
But hey, good news. Probably since I was at the 50-pounds-lost mark, I started getting attention again. Yesterday when I was on my way to the spa, I got honked at twice on the highway and once when I got out of my car in the spa parking lot. While I have no desire to turn on any men other than Hubs, it does make me feel pretty good about myself. I know, I know...feeling good should come from inside. But I firmly believe that anyone who says outside approval doesn't give them at least a little pleasure is lying through his/her teeth.
Well, this may be my most self-centered blog entry yet. I may lose a few readers, but at least I'm being honest!
I'll leave you with a few pictures from our recent mountain climbing trip. We hiked a 4,000-footer in the White Mountains, plus a few other mountains/trails. It was a good time, and just like once before, I was proud of my body for allowing me this pleasure. I've come a long way, number on the scale be damned!
(You'll notice I have no number for you. I'll be weighing in next week...got back from vacation on Tuesday and didn't particularly want to see the damage this week! LOL)
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Yuck...
I've forgotten how awful it is to detox from sugar. Crushing fatigue, pounding headache, tunnel vision, and diarrhea. If I hadn't gone through it before I'd think I was dying! Just goes to show you how awful that stuff must be for you.
Since I'm here, I'll tell you that I choked down the most disgusting salad in the world today for lunch. It was raw spinach, steamed broccoli, and some black beans...doesn't that just sound gross? I meant to put salmon in until I realized we didn't have any, so I figured the beans would be a good substitute. They're not...this I now know. Oh, and no salad dressing - thought the beans would make it okay without it - which made it extra-hard to consume. But on the bright side, it was 4 servings of vegetables.
I'm not sure that makes me feel any better. ;)
By the way, I got on the scale this morning. Couldn't help it. I'm down 4 pounds from yesterday morning. Obviously "water weight", but I still feel victorious!
Since I'm here, I'll tell you that I choked down the most disgusting salad in the world today for lunch. It was raw spinach, steamed broccoli, and some black beans...doesn't that just sound gross? I meant to put salmon in until I realized we didn't have any, so I figured the beans would be a good substitute. They're not...this I now know. Oh, and no salad dressing - thought the beans would make it okay without it - which made it extra-hard to consume. But on the bright side, it was 4 servings of vegetables.
I'm not sure that makes me feel any better. ;)
By the way, I got on the scale this morning. Couldn't help it. I'm down 4 pounds from yesterday morning. Obviously "water weight", but I still feel victorious!
Monday, August 23, 2010
I'm a Superstar!
...well, at gaining weight, anyway. ;)
This morning I weighed in at a whopping 240.6 That's a 3-pound gain from last week. There's no sugar-coating it. It's just disgusting.
And it's all my fault, by the way. Pizza for dinner three nights during the week plus two trips out for ice cream PLUS a huge, fried Italian meal with dessert in there...that'll do it. Oh, and no exercise - the piece de resistance.
So what now? Well, I have to do better...this falls into the "No Shit" category. I'll be honest though, I am sick to death of counting calories. REALLY, really sick to death. I just can't flipping stand the thought of adding up the components to one more meal. But hey, I'm doing it anyway, because sometimes we just gotta do shit we don't wanna do. To combat my complaining, however, is a real action. I've taken a page out of the book (forgive the pun...you'll see) of a gorgeous friend of mine who has lost nearly 100 pounds, and I've started reading Fit for Life. I began reading it yesterday morning and am only 40 pages from the end, so I hope to finish it tonight. I'm not sure exactly how I feel about the science behind the book because I'm not sure it's truly sound, but what I do know is that people have gotten huge results from using the plan. It's nothing extreme or crazy like Atkins or any of those other nutty plans. And again, I really don't know if what he proposes makes sense, but it certainly doesn't seem dangerous or unhealthy. He's not advocating a crash diet or a weird, motor-oil-and-eye-of-newt detox, but rather a diet made up of 70% fruits and vegetables. He's against dairy entirely...I'm not really one for cutting whole food groups out of my diet, but I'm willing to be no-dairy for a bit to see if I feel better. Truth be told, the only dairy I really eat is yogurt and cheese, so that stuff is just gonna have to go for a while. Hubs and I use almond milk for regular purposes and So Delicious Coconut Milk Creamer for our coffee, so we're kind of halfway there as it is. Plus, Hubs is lactose-intolerant and I'm actually finding that dairy upsets my stomach as well. I didn't realize this until we started using the coconut milk in our coffee. (There's not one bit of difference in the taste or the texture, by the way.)
But for now, until I familiarize myself with the plan, I'm counting calories. I did adopt one important part of his plan already, which is to not eat anything but fruit before 12 PM. Is it weird? Yeah, kinda, and I don't know if there's any good reason to do it other than the one he gives (which has to do with elimination - a euphimism for shitting). Is it unhealthy or dangerous? Hell no, so why not? This morning I had a banana, a nectarine, and a V8 Fusion. Two things with this - he says to stay away from bananas unless you're very hungry and to stick with water-based fruits. Well, bananas were what we had, so a banana it is. We'll fix it the next time we go to the store. LOL Also, the V8 Fusion is not entirely fruit, as there's some veggie juice in there, but there are no other bizarre ingredients in it. Still and all, he prefers you drink fresh-squeezed juice if you're going to have it, but for now it's a V8 Fusion. I was going to make a blueberry-strawberry smoothie this morning but didn't have the time.
So that's the deal. I'll get on the horrible treadmill today because I have to do it...I'm feeling a little out of shape lately. Not abnormal considering I haven't been on the treadmill since May. ;)
Happy Monday!
This morning I weighed in at a whopping 240.6 That's a 3-pound gain from last week. There's no sugar-coating it. It's just disgusting.
And it's all my fault, by the way. Pizza for dinner three nights during the week plus two trips out for ice cream PLUS a huge, fried Italian meal with dessert in there...that'll do it. Oh, and no exercise - the piece de resistance.
So what now? Well, I have to do better...this falls into the "No Shit" category. I'll be honest though, I am sick to death of counting calories. REALLY, really sick to death. I just can't flipping stand the thought of adding up the components to one more meal. But hey, I'm doing it anyway, because sometimes we just gotta do shit we don't wanna do. To combat my complaining, however, is a real action. I've taken a page out of the book (forgive the pun...you'll see) of a gorgeous friend of mine who has lost nearly 100 pounds, and I've started reading Fit for Life. I began reading it yesterday morning and am only 40 pages from the end, so I hope to finish it tonight. I'm not sure exactly how I feel about the science behind the book because I'm not sure it's truly sound, but what I do know is that people have gotten huge results from using the plan. It's nothing extreme or crazy like Atkins or any of those other nutty plans. And again, I really don't know if what he proposes makes sense, but it certainly doesn't seem dangerous or unhealthy. He's not advocating a crash diet or a weird, motor-oil-and-eye-of-newt detox, but rather a diet made up of 70% fruits and vegetables. He's against dairy entirely...I'm not really one for cutting whole food groups out of my diet, but I'm willing to be no-dairy for a bit to see if I feel better. Truth be told, the only dairy I really eat is yogurt and cheese, so that stuff is just gonna have to go for a while. Hubs and I use almond milk for regular purposes and So Delicious Coconut Milk Creamer for our coffee, so we're kind of halfway there as it is. Plus, Hubs is lactose-intolerant and I'm actually finding that dairy upsets my stomach as well. I didn't realize this until we started using the coconut milk in our coffee. (There's not one bit of difference in the taste or the texture, by the way.)
But for now, until I familiarize myself with the plan, I'm counting calories. I did adopt one important part of his plan already, which is to not eat anything but fruit before 12 PM. Is it weird? Yeah, kinda, and I don't know if there's any good reason to do it other than the one he gives (which has to do with elimination - a euphimism for shitting). Is it unhealthy or dangerous? Hell no, so why not? This morning I had a banana, a nectarine, and a V8 Fusion. Two things with this - he says to stay away from bananas unless you're very hungry and to stick with water-based fruits. Well, bananas were what we had, so a banana it is. We'll fix it the next time we go to the store. LOL Also, the V8 Fusion is not entirely fruit, as there's some veggie juice in there, but there are no other bizarre ingredients in it. Still and all, he prefers you drink fresh-squeezed juice if you're going to have it, but for now it's a V8 Fusion. I was going to make a blueberry-strawberry smoothie this morning but didn't have the time.
So that's the deal. I'll get on the horrible treadmill today because I have to do it...I'm feeling a little out of shape lately. Not abnormal considering I haven't been on the treadmill since May. ;)
Happy Monday!
Monday, August 16, 2010
That'll Learn Me!
Okay, folks, I'm (mostly) recovered from my surgery, back to work (boo!), and back on the wagon. I've been off the wagon now for a good month or so but the party's over now. Are you dying to know how much I weigh? Because I'm dying to tell you!
237.4. Isn't that fabulous? That's only a nearly 10-pound gain since Christmas. I mean, really...couldn't have gone any better than that. [Insert eye-rolling here.]
So what did I learn? Well, I learned that I'm not as good as I think I am! I'm not anywhere close to an intuitive eater like I thought I was - I'm more of a donuts-cookies-brownies-ice cream-every-day kind of eater. I ate a lot of high fat, high calorie foods and don't think I even ate one fruit or vegetable on purpose.
I used my handy little Lose It! app on my iTouch this morning and it said that if I stick to my recommended calories per day to lose 2 pounds a week, I can be done by January. To think that I'll hit the Christmas season and be 10 pounds within my goal weight is a great incentive to just commit and quit stalling! I'm tired of dieting and I want to be finished, but I'm not going to finish until I hit my goal of 190 pounds. I have two vacations, a birthday, Thanksgiving, and Christmas in there, so while I might not reach it exactly by January, I'll give it till February. I'm having an awesome get-together in the city with friends this spring and I want to look even more amazing than I do now. ;)
Part of the challenge before I think was my calorie intake. I usually wasn't allowing myself to have anything over 1300 calories a day...considering that we need 1200 just to be alive, I know I wasn't eating enough. No wonder I was ravenous and the came home and scarfed food out of the pantry. My LoseIt! app tells me to eat 1701 a day but I subtracted 200 for a total of 1501 a day. I think that's reasonable, and so far I don't feel hungry today. It's amazing what a little extra food can do, eh?
I'm also changing my weigh-in day back to Monday. As I mentioned here, the Friday weigh-in is a bad idea...yet somehow I still got back to it. Bad, bad idea. No more! I'm going to get back into the exercise game as well, I just have to get the green light from my surgeon. I meet with him this Wednesday so hopefully he'll have good news.
Hubs and I will still be having one dinner and one breakfast out during the week. This helps me keep my sanity and doesn't pose a problem for my weight loss. It only becomes a problem when twice a week out turns into 4 or 5 times a week. This Friday we have reservations at Rainforest Cafe - love it there!
Happy Monday, folks!
237.4. Isn't that fabulous? That's only a nearly 10-pound gain since Christmas. I mean, really...couldn't have gone any better than that. [Insert eye-rolling here.]
So what did I learn? Well, I learned that I'm not as good as I think I am! I'm not anywhere close to an intuitive eater like I thought I was - I'm more of a donuts-cookies-brownies-ice cream-every-day kind of eater. I ate a lot of high fat, high calorie foods and don't think I even ate one fruit or vegetable on purpose.
I used my handy little Lose It! app on my iTouch this morning and it said that if I stick to my recommended calories per day to lose 2 pounds a week, I can be done by January. To think that I'll hit the Christmas season and be 10 pounds within my goal weight is a great incentive to just commit and quit stalling! I'm tired of dieting and I want to be finished, but I'm not going to finish until I hit my goal of 190 pounds. I have two vacations, a birthday, Thanksgiving, and Christmas in there, so while I might not reach it exactly by January, I'll give it till February. I'm having an awesome get-together in the city with friends this spring and I want to look even more amazing than I do now. ;)
Part of the challenge before I think was my calorie intake. I usually wasn't allowing myself to have anything over 1300 calories a day...considering that we need 1200 just to be alive, I know I wasn't eating enough. No wonder I was ravenous and the came home and scarfed food out of the pantry. My LoseIt! app tells me to eat 1701 a day but I subtracted 200 for a total of 1501 a day. I think that's reasonable, and so far I don't feel hungry today. It's amazing what a little extra food can do, eh?
I'm also changing my weigh-in day back to Monday. As I mentioned here, the Friday weigh-in is a bad idea...yet somehow I still got back to it. Bad, bad idea. No more! I'm going to get back into the exercise game as well, I just have to get the green light from my surgeon. I meet with him this Wednesday so hopefully he'll have good news.
Hubs and I will still be having one dinner and one breakfast out during the week. This helps me keep my sanity and doesn't pose a problem for my weight loss. It only becomes a problem when twice a week out turns into 4 or 5 times a week. This Friday we have reservations at Rainforest Cafe - love it there!
Happy Monday, folks!
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Gallbladder Adventures
Well, I'm alive. I'm alive and having a muffin and coffee for breakfast, so this is good.
Let me tell you something. I am so glad that I only had one gallbladder to remove. And I hope to hell that I never have to have another abdominal surgery, laparascopic or otherwise, because dude, it sucked ass. It feels like I did 5000 sit-ups in one minute. Oh, and you'll never believe how often you need to use your abdominal muscles to move.
My big worry for my surgery was the anesthesia...for some reason, the thought of general anesthesia and intubation just scared the shit out of me. So imagine my relief when I met my (cute) anesthesiologist and found out he graduated only 7 years before me from the same medical school that I did. I said, "Ahhhh, well at least I know you got a good education!" He was funny and comforting and I was so proud of where he and I came from, because that'swhat kind of doctorswe were taught to be. It was awesome. He let me know he'd be giving me Versed before intubating me, and all I could think to say was, "Man, I have control issues. That's going to be so hard." That's the last thing I remember saying.
When I woke up I wasn't crying or swearing like I was when I came out of twilight anesthesia after getting my wisdom teeth removed. I was grateful and as gracious as possible because I wanted these folks to take good care of me. I think I said "thank you" twenty times, even if it wasn't warranted. "Nicole, you're all finished, honey." "Thank you." "You did great." "Thank you." We're going to get you back to your room now." "Thank you." I think they probably felt very appreciated. LOL
My surgeon was surprised when I told him before my surgery that I kicked Hubs out of the hospital. The guilt I would have harbored knowing that he just sat in the waiting room for hours would have been insurmountable. Hubs reluctantly agreed to leave and get some things done while I was in surgery even though he thought it would be better to stay in the waiting room. I appealed to him by saying, "Why? It's not like you can help, right?" LOL So we agreed that the surgeon would call him when I was finished and in the recovery room, and wouldn't you know when I returned to my same-day surgery room, there was Hubs, waiting expectantly. He sat and held my hand while I slept for another 90 minutes and then we came home.
I came home to a gift bag full of good stuff - magazines (Us Weekly, Maxim, Women's Health, Food), 3 boxes of gourmet chocolate, a bag of chocolate-covered pretzels, a card, monkey stickers, and a bracelet. That's Hubs for you. :) He catered to me all day and all night, and this morning when he left for work he tied a rope to the footboard of our bed so that I could get in and out with leverage. LOL Seriously, how awesome is that? And I did use it, too. But now I'm safely planted in our sunroom with my laptop, a book, and more magazines than I can read in a day. Oh, and a muffin and coffee.
If any of you ever have surgery, let me know. You can borrow Hubs, because I promise you'll never be better looked after.
Let me tell you something. I am so glad that I only had one gallbladder to remove. And I hope to hell that I never have to have another abdominal surgery, laparascopic or otherwise, because dude, it sucked ass. It feels like I did 5000 sit-ups in one minute. Oh, and you'll never believe how often you need to use your abdominal muscles to move.
My big worry for my surgery was the anesthesia...for some reason, the thought of general anesthesia and intubation just scared the shit out of me. So imagine my relief when I met my (cute) anesthesiologist and found out he graduated only 7 years before me from the same medical school that I did. I said, "Ahhhh, well at least I know you got a good education!" He was funny and comforting and I was so proud of where he and I came from, because that'swhat kind of doctorswe were taught to be. It was awesome. He let me know he'd be giving me Versed before intubating me, and all I could think to say was, "Man, I have control issues. That's going to be so hard." That's the last thing I remember saying.
When I woke up I wasn't crying or swearing like I was when I came out of twilight anesthesia after getting my wisdom teeth removed. I was grateful and as gracious as possible because I wanted these folks to take good care of me. I think I said "thank you" twenty times, even if it wasn't warranted. "Nicole, you're all finished, honey." "Thank you." "You did great." "Thank you." We're going to get you back to your room now." "Thank you." I think they probably felt very appreciated. LOL
My surgeon was surprised when I told him before my surgery that I kicked Hubs out of the hospital. The guilt I would have harbored knowing that he just sat in the waiting room for hours would have been insurmountable. Hubs reluctantly agreed to leave and get some things done while I was in surgery even though he thought it would be better to stay in the waiting room. I appealed to him by saying, "Why? It's not like you can help, right?" LOL So we agreed that the surgeon would call him when I was finished and in the recovery room, and wouldn't you know when I returned to my same-day surgery room, there was Hubs, waiting expectantly. He sat and held my hand while I slept for another 90 minutes and then we came home.
I came home to a gift bag full of good stuff - magazines (Us Weekly, Maxim, Women's Health, Food), 3 boxes of gourmet chocolate, a bag of chocolate-covered pretzels, a card, monkey stickers, and a bracelet. That's Hubs for you. :) He catered to me all day and all night, and this morning when he left for work he tied a rope to the footboard of our bed so that I could get in and out with leverage. LOL Seriously, how awesome is that? And I did use it, too. But now I'm safely planted in our sunroom with my laptop, a book, and more magazines than I can read in a day. Oh, and a muffin and coffee.
If any of you ever have surgery, let me know. You can borrow Hubs, because I promise you'll never be better looked after.
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Don't Eat Healthy
Let me make the back story as short as possible. Since December of 2009 I've had four wicked episodes of abdominal pain, one that sent me to the emergency room in January and one that would have sent me there this past Monday night had I not known for sure what it was. Right upper quadrant pain that goes around to my back and up to my right shoulder - this here is textbook biliary colic (pain from gallstones). I had it once in December, once in January, and once this past Monday. I was fine with it, even though it was excruciating on Monday night, because I knew what it was and it didn't freak me out. I just took two heavy duty painkillers that I was prescribed during my ER visit, which I had NEVER taken before Monday night, and went to sleep. I woke up very sweaty and tired but feeling much better on Tuesday morning, and I told myself that if this horrible pain only happened once or twice or three times a year, I could take it. I've also had some random abdominal pains in that general area since last year, but whatever...nothing to write home about.
I didn't think anything else of it until it happened again on Thursday night, just four days later. Then I woke up Friday morning and almost barfed in the shower, and I dealt with abdominal/back pain all day at work. That's when I knew something wasn't good. Cue me calling a general surgeon for an appointment.
Interesting aside: I was talking about my predicament on Friday morning with one of the doctors I work with, who has been out of his residency for a few years now. When I told him that this pain landed me in the ER back in January and that they didn't even do an ultrasound while I was there, he said, "Did you let them know you were a doctor?" I told him of course I didn't, it's not something I broadcast just for shits and giggles. He said, "It's okay to announce it. You'll get better treatment, which is unfair, but it's still true." Isn't that horrible? I mean, HE wasn't being horrible...he was stating what is a truth. But it's still a shame.
So now go back to me calling the general surgeon. The surgeon's secretary said, "He's not in the office today, he's only on call. You'll have to come to the emergency room." And I said, almost apologetically, "Ugh, I just feel so stupid. I'm a doctor...I don't know why I let it go this long!" So smooth, right? Well, I'll tell you what...that surgeon's door opened for me. The secretary actually said, "Oh, you're a doctor? Hmmm...let me see...you know, I can probably get him to come see you later today." He came in to see me that afternoon, PLUS set me up for an ultrasound and pre-admission bloodwork after hours. That doctor thing works sometimes.
So there I am getting my ultrasound. The ultrasound tech is super nice, and I'm looking at all of my organs on the little monitor. Then I see my gallbladder...full of gallstones. I go, "Holy shit, look at that!" She said, "I'm not a doctor, I'm not allowed to say anything about your images!" I said, "It's okay, I'm a doctor, and those are gallstones." She calls the surgeon and puts me on the phone with him, and the first thing I say is, verbatim, "Dude, my gallbladder has like a bazillion stones in it." Very intelligent.
And now, ladies and gentlemen, I am scheduled to have surgery on August 10th. Balls.
What's with the eating healthy thing? Well, I'll tell you. Most people think it's fat people that get gallstones. Most people think you have to have a crappy diet to get them. Au contraire, mon frere. The surgeon said my gallstones most likely formed when I drastically changed my diet a little over a year ago. I stopped eating processed, nasty foods and instead filled my diet with mostly whole foods, a lot of fruits and vegetables, and a lot of plant sources. Because my gallbladder didn't have to squeeze out bile as much anymore to emulsify a bunch of fat, the bile just chilled out in my gallbladder, stagnating and finally forming little stones. (My surgeon friend asked me last night, "Is it one or two big stones?" I said, "No, it's a bunch of pebbles." He said, "Oh man, they're the worst kind." Thanks.)
Oh, and the people who say fried, fatty foods bring on gallbladder attacks? True enough...just not entirely. On Monday night, which was by far the worst pain I've ever experienced, I had eaten steamed broccoli, steamed brown rice, and tofu for dinner. And on Thursday night, the attack that carried through until yesterday, I had spaghetti squash with organic marinara sauce and a piece of whole wheat bread with less than a teaspoon of butter. I mean, really. And interestingly enough, Hubs and I went out for dinner last night and I had no symptoms at all. And I did NOT have a healthy dinner. But that's the way it's gone for me - my attacks were all after healthy meals, and when I'm on vacation or something and am not eating healthy at all, I have no problem with it. Maybe so much bile is squeezing out that it's just pushing the stones right out of the way. ;) Maybe I need that action in my gallbladder. It may not just be a joke actually, because they did see one stone stuck in the top of my gallbladder during the ultrasound, and I'd hardly eaten anything yesterday until dinner.
Funny story: The ultrasound tech said, "Have you eaten anything today?" I said, "Yes, I had a peach at 12 PM." (It was 4 PM.) She said, "Oh, we really like you to be fasting..." And I said, "Well, it was a peach....4 hours ago....I think it's gone by now." LOL
I also think it's funny when people say that having their gallbladder out made them gain weight. No...you gained weight because now that your gallbladder is out you can eat all the fried, disgusting, fatty shit that you want.
So now you know The Adventures of My Gallbladder. Think goods thoughts for me on the 10th. General anesthesia scares the shit out of me!
--------------------------------------------------------
By the way, 230.8 yesterday. That's down 2.8 since the Friday after vacation (last Friday) from 233.6. My metabolism did its job on our vacation and held me pretty steady, though I definitely did gain a bit. That's okay, I'd rather gain a pound or two than get off track completely.
Happy weekend! :)
I didn't think anything else of it until it happened again on Thursday night, just four days later. Then I woke up Friday morning and almost barfed in the shower, and I dealt with abdominal/back pain all day at work. That's when I knew something wasn't good. Cue me calling a general surgeon for an appointment.
Interesting aside: I was talking about my predicament on Friday morning with one of the doctors I work with, who has been out of his residency for a few years now. When I told him that this pain landed me in the ER back in January and that they didn't even do an ultrasound while I was there, he said, "Did you let them know you were a doctor?" I told him of course I didn't, it's not something I broadcast just for shits and giggles. He said, "It's okay to announce it. You'll get better treatment, which is unfair, but it's still true." Isn't that horrible? I mean, HE wasn't being horrible...he was stating what is a truth. But it's still a shame.
So now go back to me calling the general surgeon. The surgeon's secretary said, "He's not in the office today, he's only on call. You'll have to come to the emergency room." And I said, almost apologetically, "Ugh, I just feel so stupid. I'm a doctor...I don't know why I let it go this long!" So smooth, right? Well, I'll tell you what...that surgeon's door opened for me. The secretary actually said, "Oh, you're a doctor? Hmmm...let me see...you know, I can probably get him to come see you later today." He came in to see me that afternoon, PLUS set me up for an ultrasound and pre-admission bloodwork after hours. That doctor thing works sometimes.
So there I am getting my ultrasound. The ultrasound tech is super nice, and I'm looking at all of my organs on the little monitor. Then I see my gallbladder...full of gallstones. I go, "Holy shit, look at that!" She said, "I'm not a doctor, I'm not allowed to say anything about your images!" I said, "It's okay, I'm a doctor, and those are gallstones." She calls the surgeon and puts me on the phone with him, and the first thing I say is, verbatim, "Dude, my gallbladder has like a bazillion stones in it." Very intelligent.
And now, ladies and gentlemen, I am scheduled to have surgery on August 10th. Balls.
What's with the eating healthy thing? Well, I'll tell you. Most people think it's fat people that get gallstones. Most people think you have to have a crappy diet to get them. Au contraire, mon frere. The surgeon said my gallstones most likely formed when I drastically changed my diet a little over a year ago. I stopped eating processed, nasty foods and instead filled my diet with mostly whole foods, a lot of fruits and vegetables, and a lot of plant sources. Because my gallbladder didn't have to squeeze out bile as much anymore to emulsify a bunch of fat, the bile just chilled out in my gallbladder, stagnating and finally forming little stones. (My surgeon friend asked me last night, "Is it one or two big stones?" I said, "No, it's a bunch of pebbles." He said, "Oh man, they're the worst kind." Thanks.)
Oh, and the people who say fried, fatty foods bring on gallbladder attacks? True enough...just not entirely. On Monday night, which was by far the worst pain I've ever experienced, I had eaten steamed broccoli, steamed brown rice, and tofu for dinner. And on Thursday night, the attack that carried through until yesterday, I had spaghetti squash with organic marinara sauce and a piece of whole wheat bread with less than a teaspoon of butter. I mean, really. And interestingly enough, Hubs and I went out for dinner last night and I had no symptoms at all. And I did NOT have a healthy dinner. But that's the way it's gone for me - my attacks were all after healthy meals, and when I'm on vacation or something and am not eating healthy at all, I have no problem with it. Maybe so much bile is squeezing out that it's just pushing the stones right out of the way. ;) Maybe I need that action in my gallbladder. It may not just be a joke actually, because they did see one stone stuck in the top of my gallbladder during the ultrasound, and I'd hardly eaten anything yesterday until dinner.
Funny story: The ultrasound tech said, "Have you eaten anything today?" I said, "Yes, I had a peach at 12 PM." (It was 4 PM.) She said, "Oh, we really like you to be fasting..." And I said, "Well, it was a peach....4 hours ago....I think it's gone by now." LOL
I also think it's funny when people say that having their gallbladder out made them gain weight. No...you gained weight because now that your gallbladder is out you can eat all the fried, disgusting, fatty shit that you want.
So now you know The Adventures of My Gallbladder. Think goods thoughts for me on the 10th. General anesthesia scares the shit out of me!
--------------------------------------------------------
By the way, 230.8 yesterday. That's down 2.8 since the Friday after vacation (last Friday) from 233.6. My metabolism did its job on our vacation and held me pretty steady, though I definitely did gain a bit. That's okay, I'd rather gain a pound or two than get off track completely.
Happy weekend! :)
Monday, July 19, 2010
Linen Pants
Folks, I'm back from vacation...perhaps not exactly skinnier than before, but definitely back. We had an awesome time at the beach, and I consumed enough calories to power a small village for at least a week. I didn't have any majorly disgusting binges or anything, just a lot of eating here and there, grazing on high-calorie, high-fat, processed crap. I'm actually feeling good about getting back on the wagon, if you can believe that! I'm sure that feeling will last all of a week or so. ;)
Here's the good news though: My linen pants, which I'm not sure if I've referenced in the past, still fit. Quick linen pants back story for you...I bought a pair of these gorgeous, off-white pants about 5 years ago. Linen, no stretch, very pricey. That last fact was unfortunate though, because the pants never fit me. But of course I never took them back - instead, I always told myself that I would lose a few pounds to fit into them and that they would be my motivation...
...hahahaha!!! Oh, that's hysterical. Oh God, ouch...I think my side actually hurts from laughing. Too funny. But that's actually what happened.
So anyway, I've been trying these pants on periodically throughout my weight loss. At one point I couldn't get them higher than my knees. A few months ago I could pull them up over my ass but it looked like I was trying to cram 10 pounds of meat into a 5 pound sack. They zipped and buttoned but I still looked gross. Then about a month or two ago I tried them on again - the number on the scale has essentially been the same since Christmas, mind you - and they buttoned, zipped, AND looked amazing. And so to celebrate the fact that they still fit, I'm wearing them today. :) Comfortable as ever.
I'm back on track today, but it sucks a big one. I'm hungry, I'm low on energy, and the fact that these pants still fit makes me want to go out and have a salty, fatty dinner with Hubs. (I guess so I can eventually make them NOT fit again?) Damn linen pants! They're a double-edged sword.
Official weigh-in this Friday. Stay tuned!
Here's the good news though: My linen pants, which I'm not sure if I've referenced in the past, still fit. Quick linen pants back story for you...I bought a pair of these gorgeous, off-white pants about 5 years ago. Linen, no stretch, very pricey. That last fact was unfortunate though, because the pants never fit me. But of course I never took them back - instead, I always told myself that I would lose a few pounds to fit into them and that they would be my motivation...
...hahahaha!!! Oh, that's hysterical. Oh God, ouch...I think my side actually hurts from laughing. Too funny. But that's actually what happened.
So anyway, I've been trying these pants on periodically throughout my weight loss. At one point I couldn't get them higher than my knees. A few months ago I could pull them up over my ass but it looked like I was trying to cram 10 pounds of meat into a 5 pound sack. They zipped and buttoned but I still looked gross. Then about a month or two ago I tried them on again - the number on the scale has essentially been the same since Christmas, mind you - and they buttoned, zipped, AND looked amazing. And so to celebrate the fact that they still fit, I'm wearing them today. :) Comfortable as ever.
I'm back on track today, but it sucks a big one. I'm hungry, I'm low on energy, and the fact that these pants still fit makes me want to go out and have a salty, fatty dinner with Hubs. (I guess so I can eventually make them NOT fit again?) Damn linen pants! They're a double-edged sword.
Official weigh-in this Friday. Stay tuned!
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Long Time, No Weigh!
Get it? Instead of "long time, no see"? I'm so clever! It must be all the glucose feeding my brain.
Okay, seriously now. I haven't weighed myself since June 18th, and I have no plans to do so until Friday of this week, and even then I may not. Why? Well, because I feel fat. Do I think I'm actually fatter? No, not at all. Everything that fit before still fits, everything that was loose is still just as loose. It's clearly psychological - I know that I haven't been following my healthy eating plan as strictly as usual, so I automatically feel as if my face looks fat and I have puffy fingers. It's just the way it is.
I'd been doing fairly well up until the holiday weekend. I'd been getting in my 5-9 fruits and vegetables every day, all of my water, and staying in a reasonable calorie range. Reasonable meaning I'd eat about 800 throughout the day and then just eat dinner without counting. Dinner was never anything like a bucket of fat smeared with butter, so I wasn't worried. But see, then the holiday weekend happened, and holiday weekends are baaaaad. Think beer, mixed drinks, wine, desserts, chips, and ice cream. Nothing in gigantic proportions, but still more than I should have consumed. What can I say? If I get a taste of it I miss it. And I really gave myself license to eat this weekend (up to and including Monday!).
Still though...am I worried? No, I'm not. Am I deluding myself? No, I'm not. I'm not going to gain weight by eating like a "normal" person. "Normal" people allow themselves to indulge and don't worry about packing on 10 pounds in one sitting. "Normal" people know better, and I have to remember that. They know that the give-and-take will be what matters - indulge today, eat healthier tomorrow. Even Steven (Seinfeld reference!). It's all about a give and take, but for us dieters, give and take almost seems like a sin. Clearly we will gain weight if we don't stick to 1200 calories a day that come from only fruits, vegetables, complex carbs, and a touch of protein. Obviously we will beef up to critical mass if we miss a day of exercise or don't drink all of our water or even - *GASP* - eat dessert more than once a week. This will derail us completely and we will gain back all 5, 10, 20, 50+ pounds we lost. We're so unlucky.
Does anyone else find this extreme black-and-white thinking horrifying? Gosh, how much more punitive can we get than when we are chastising ourselves for not being perfect eaters? And look, I'm not saying this to give us all carte blanche to just eat through our pantries or refrigerators or cupboards of shame. I'm not talking about either extreme here - neither the perfect nor the wretched. I'm talking about sometimes relaxing and finding the middle. And let's face it, the middle doesn't always help us lose weight, right? But the middle is what helps us maintain, and maintaining is a valuable lesson in and of itself.
Voltaire said, "Don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good." Voltaire was awesome for that, and that's become a quote that I apply to many areas of my life.
And before I forget, the lovely Lauren over at Piece of the Pie commented on my last post and wanted to know how dinner was. Truth is, Lauren, I don't remember! LOL It's been so long since I've posted that I can't recall a damn thing. But when I have a fabulous dinner sometime this week I'll give a full report. :)
Happy Tuesday!!!
Okay, seriously now. I haven't weighed myself since June 18th, and I have no plans to do so until Friday of this week, and even then I may not. Why? Well, because I feel fat. Do I think I'm actually fatter? No, not at all. Everything that fit before still fits, everything that was loose is still just as loose. It's clearly psychological - I know that I haven't been following my healthy eating plan as strictly as usual, so I automatically feel as if my face looks fat and I have puffy fingers. It's just the way it is.
I'd been doing fairly well up until the holiday weekend. I'd been getting in my 5-9 fruits and vegetables every day, all of my water, and staying in a reasonable calorie range. Reasonable meaning I'd eat about 800 throughout the day and then just eat dinner without counting. Dinner was never anything like a bucket of fat smeared with butter, so I wasn't worried. But see, then the holiday weekend happened, and holiday weekends are baaaaad. Think beer, mixed drinks, wine, desserts, chips, and ice cream. Nothing in gigantic proportions, but still more than I should have consumed. What can I say? If I get a taste of it I miss it. And I really gave myself license to eat this weekend (up to and including Monday!).
Still though...am I worried? No, I'm not. Am I deluding myself? No, I'm not. I'm not going to gain weight by eating like a "normal" person. "Normal" people allow themselves to indulge and don't worry about packing on 10 pounds in one sitting. "Normal" people know better, and I have to remember that. They know that the give-and-take will be what matters - indulge today, eat healthier tomorrow. Even Steven (Seinfeld reference!). It's all about a give and take, but for us dieters, give and take almost seems like a sin. Clearly we will gain weight if we don't stick to 1200 calories a day that come from only fruits, vegetables, complex carbs, and a touch of protein. Obviously we will beef up to critical mass if we miss a day of exercise or don't drink all of our water or even - *GASP* - eat dessert more than once a week. This will derail us completely and we will gain back all 5, 10, 20, 50+ pounds we lost. We're so unlucky.
Does anyone else find this extreme black-and-white thinking horrifying? Gosh, how much more punitive can we get than when we are chastising ourselves for not being perfect eaters? And look, I'm not saying this to give us all carte blanche to just eat through our pantries or refrigerators or cupboards of shame. I'm not talking about either extreme here - neither the perfect nor the wretched. I'm talking about sometimes relaxing and finding the middle. And let's face it, the middle doesn't always help us lose weight, right? But the middle is what helps us maintain, and maintaining is a valuable lesson in and of itself.
Voltaire said, "Don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good." Voltaire was awesome for that, and that's become a quote that I apply to many areas of my life.
And before I forget, the lovely Lauren over at Piece of the Pie commented on my last post and wanted to know how dinner was. Truth is, Lauren, I don't remember! LOL It's been so long since I've posted that I can't recall a damn thing. But when I have a fabulous dinner sometime this week I'll give a full report. :)
Happy Tuesday!!!
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